Dirty Little Secret: Baggage

“If God meant for us to carry baggage around, he would have made our skin have little pouches like kangaroos” ― Rachel Van Dyken

Ever wonder why you probably have less success in your attempts to influence others than you’d like? There are probably two reasons here.

The first is the secret that most of us don’t realize, that we have more influence through our passive indirect behaviors than we do with our active direct behaviors, as I mentioned here.

The second reason is another Dirty Little Secret.

Have you also ever noticed that there are times when you act a certain way or react to circumstances in a certain way, most often in a defensive or avoidance mode for self-preservation? You probably have a very good idea why you do it (and want to keep that a secret, too).

You probably have also observed others whose responses in certain circumstances are driven by protective or defensive behaviors (when they think that they are keeping it a secret).

The reason: Some People have Baggage. But that is not a secret. Nor is it THE Dirty Little Secret.

You no doubt have observed that a lot of people you interact with have baggage (for instance, odd Uncle Harry, or weird Aunt Alice). But then there are those you think just seem to have it all together.

Nope. They don’t.

Consider the following:

-Some people who appear to have it all together, just have really small baggage:




-Others carry a bit more, but maybe a bit discretely:





-Then there are those who are more casual about the baggage they have:






-While others have finally reached the point of needing effort to pull it behind them:

Man with Wheeled Carry-on





-But then there are some who will need additional hands to deal with their baggage:






-Or those that really have enough baggage to need some extra space:

40_ft_container image blackhillsportal.com






-But there are rare cases you might know where someone needs professional help:

Container-Ship-300x200 image marine insight.com






-And finally, there are those who seem to be beyond help:

rena-cargo-ship-nz image coastal care.org






The reality is, that secret you were trying to keep secret: everybody already knows.

But the Dirty Little Secret that nobody realizes is Fundamental Principle 15:

Everybody Has Baggage – Absolutely Everybody

It is this personal baggage that influences our Practiced Behavior, not only affecting those situations where we are actively trying to influence others (spouse, parenting, network, managing, leading), but those situations where we are unaware that we are passively influencing others.

Two following questions: Where does this baggage come from? And, how do you deal with it?

That’s a discussion for next time.


About Jim Edmonds

I am a husband, father, mentor, who once was a chemist turned physicist turned marketer turned executive turned missionary turned professor. And survived it all.
This entry was posted in 05: People, 14: Behavior, 15: Baggage and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to Dirty Little Secret: Baggage

  1. Pingback: Whoa! I’ve Got Baggage?! | Road Signs and Blind Spots

  2. Jennifer says:

    Love the visual aids:)


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s