“When you’re dealt lemons in life, make lemonade” – Said by way too many people to count.
I think I’ve passed a tipping point. No, not the tangible reality of another birthday, but that intangible feeling that something just happened. That it is now time to leave Fundamental Principles behind, for the most part, and time to pay attention to Confirmations.
This is probably why it has been taking so much effort to compose the next posts on my To-Write list, and so much easier to react with a sense of Fundamental Principle déjà vu with regards to the current events and current information (even well filtered) that are thrust upon us.
This guest post is one of those reminders that other people are seeing many of the same Fundamental Principles in life and expressing them in a wonderfully perceptive and unique way. The author is again @JessicaHagy (an earlier guest post from her is here). I discovered her thoughts and drawings (or ‘graphs and charts,’ in her words) only after I had made some attempts to add my own hand drawn ‘pictorial’ enhancements to my posts. Hers are better. I think of her as ‘colleague.’ We’ve exchanged two tweets.
Here are Jessica’s thoughts, originally posted on Forbes. Keep an eye out for evidence of Fundamental Principles:
Imperfection Is Everything (#LifeHacks)
Perfection is a lie. It’s an idea without an example, an unreachable goal. Perfection leaves no room for priorities, no space for humanness, no time for joy. Striving for it leads to breakdowns, burning out, eating disorders and self-hatred. The pursuit of perfection is a Sisyphean task. It is unrewarding, frustrating, and worst of all: entirely subjective. Perfection looks different and means different things to everyone.
As long as you strive to be perfect, you will feel like you are not enough. You will feel inferior, and weak, and impossible, and hopeless. Perfection is a cruel, unreachable goal. You are not perfect. You never will be. No one will. Your work will never be perfect. Your face, your home, your relationships, your tastes, your tone, your thoughts: imperfect, all of it, always and forever. And yet: you are beautiful and impressive and tragic and charming and silly and broken and fascinating: imperfect and wonderful, in your entirety.
Unlike perfection, you can work with what’s imperfect, you can work to make imperfect ideas better, you can change imperfect objects, you can relate to imperfect people. Imperfection is opportunity. It’s workable, ownable, and worthwhile. Perfection is photoshop. It’s fakery. It’s unrealistic. It’s a refusal to accept complexity and reality. There are no perfect mothers, bosses, workers, victims, athletes, thinkers, or leaders. There are no perfect people.
Imperfection is reality. Perfection is fiction. Forget being perfect. Work instead with what’s real, with what’s important. Otherwise, you’ll only become perfectly miserable.
Did you sense any presence, any Confirmations of Fundamental Principles? I spotted Fundamental Principle 15, Absolutely Everybody Has Baggage, Fundamental Principle 14, Attitudes become Behaviors by Choice (Success comes to those who, when dealt crises and difficulties, look to find the opportunities), Fundamental Principle 8, We choose to learn something new every day, and Fundamental Principle 9, What you DO is even more important. There may be more.
Originally posted on Women@Forbes, it is uncanny how applicable Jessica’s perceptions are to men also. Basically, I think, applicable to our human nature in any circumstances.
Somewhat more subtle, on the other hand, is the realization that if we once wrestle with and overcome our own baggage, we then have the opportunity, nay the obligation to prevent this baggage accumulation in our children through our improved (but still imperfect) parenting. Better a young child learn a healthy reality from a parent they must interact with, than take a chance they might just stumble upon a blog post later in life. After all, the ability to deal with life’s later challenging External Forces begins with learning to deal early on with our own Internal Forces.
Perhaps even more subtle, if one thinks about it, is if management in our organizations didn’t so often see weaknesses and faults in their reports as obstacles to overcome to reach goals and objectives, but as opportunities to encourage employee self-development and increased engagement so that goals and objectives would follow.
Hmmm, there’s another one: Fundamental Principle 14k, Behavioral Continuity, the proverbial domino effects of behavior.
With that, I’ll head back to my RSS feed. No doubt, given today’s world, more Confirmations are to come.